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How short kings and queens dominated 2024 - from a short queen's perspective


How short kings and queens dominated 2024 - from a short queen's perspective

I come from a family of shorties. Coming in at (barely) 4 feet 9 1/2 inches - all I ever grew up around in my immediate circle were other like-minded shorties. I mean we all are within a few inches of each other (well, that is except for my younger brother who is 5-foot-8. Bless him, he's considered the tall one).

But as I left my stubby-limbed bubble, the world wasn't as kind or understanding. People of average height would make being short into a joke or problem, such as saying the classic line, "How's the weather down there?" Boys at school would try to use my head or shoulders as an armrest. Some of my (former) friends would even tell me I'm technically a dwarf because I'm under 5 feet for mean, dramatic effect.

They all made being short sound so much worse than it was. In reality, I'm mostly neutral about my height. I crop and tailor my clothes when they are too big, and I fit in all my petite mom's vintage '90s hand-me-downs. The only downside to my small stature is that I still, for the life of me, cannot reach anything on high shelves at the grocery store or my cabinets. But that's why I have two stools and a ladder for my high-ceiling Brooklyn apartment. And why I dangerously climb shelves at the grocery store instead of asking for help.

Tall people have endless representation like professional athletes Shaquille O'Neal, Lebron James and Brittney Griner at the forefront of culture. (Except for decorated Olympian Simone Biles, who is a 4-foot-8 powerhouse. Obviously, a point for the short people column.) Athletes and models embody the sought-after taller, slender beauty standard.

This summer, people on TikTok even spread the audio for Megan Boni's viral video that goes, "I'm looking for a man in finance. Trust fund, [6-foot-5], blue eyes," which pokes fun at unreasonable dating standards. While y'all are looking for your skyscraper, tall kings and queens, I'm here to tell you short people have had a bit of an edge in the zeitgeist this year.

Tyler James Williams and Quinta Brunson on "Abbott Elementary" (ABC)It's been a fabulous year for petite princes and princesses and tiny titans. A bright example is comedian and writer Quinta Brunson. In the fourth year of her smash comedy hit "Abbott Elementary," the megastar is only gaining more power like Thanos and she's only a mere 4 feet 11 inches . . . and a half. You can't forget the half.

But seriously, the "Abbott" showrunner and star has just clinched a 2025 Golden Globe nomination for best comedy actress in a TV series, won an Emmy early in September for her writing, and her show is only getting bigger and better.

Mostly, Brunson just gets what it's like to be a short, grown Black woman. She once joked in a stand-up set at the Laugh Factory, "People treat being short like there's something wrong with you like it's some type of disease or like you're very Other. It's what I imagine racism to feel like - I don't know!"

Brunson's not the only compact person who has stolen our hearts this year. Short pop stars like Ariana Grande have blown audiences and critics away with her portrayal of Glinda in the movie musical adaptation of "Wicked" and even snagged a 2025 Golden Globe nomination for best supporting actress in a musical or comedy for the role. Grande is such a musical powerhouse, she sometimes tricks us into forgetting she's just a mere 5-foot-1. Maybe because she's always in stilettos.

Bruno Mars of Silk Sonic performs onstage at the 64th Annual Grammy Awards held at the MGM Grand Garden Arena on April 3rd, 2022 in Las Vegas, Nevada. (Chris Polk/Variety/Penske Media via Getty Images)One of pop music's most electrifying male performers, Bruno Mars also had a banger of a year. Three years ago, he deviated from his usual pop for his soaring '70s R&B project Silk Sonic with Anderson .Paak and then took a break from performing. But this year, the pop prince came back swinging to claim his throne with songs collaborating with pop divas Lady Gaga and Rosé from Blackpink, both of which went viral. Mars reached over 138,3 million monthly listeners on Spotify, becoming the first artist to do so. He's also is the second artist, after Sabrina Carpenter, "to replace himself at number one and take the top two spots" at the same time on the Billboard Global 200 and Global Excluding United States with these two songs. Standing at 5-feet-5 tall, whatever Mars lacks in height, he makes up in sheer musical genius.

Another miniature man making a name for himself is "Saturday Night Live" heartthrob and self-proclaimed short king, Marcello Hernández. The Cuban-Dominican, Miami-born comedian was just upped to series regular in the show's 50th season - so clearly, he's doing something right.

Since his casting last year, Hernández has injected the sketch comedy show with a sense of self-deprecating humor and short-man empowerment - I know that sounds oxymoronic. But Hernández's appeal is rooted in his self-awareness and sardonic humor. In one of his first sketches, he says, "I know I'm short. You know how I know? Because when I lie about my height I say I'm [5-foot-9], which really means I'm [5-foot-7 1/2], and I'm lying about the half."

Marcello Hernández on "Saturday Night Live" (NBC)

In the recent "SNL" episode with host Paul Mescal, the 5-foot-11 Irish man jokedsabout his viral photos wearing skin-baring athletic shorts. Hernández interrupts Mescal's monologue dressed in a pair of snug short shorts while slapping his bare thighs. "I'm trying to be like you man. You like what you see?" he asks.

"Absolutely not. By the way, those are way too short," said Mescal.

Hernández quips, "Well you know what they say, Paul. The shorter the shorts, the taller you look."

Hernández has even linked up with this year's most searched artist and resident short girl, Sabrina Carpenter. The pair, who met at Variety's Power of Young Hollywood Awards, planned a skit during her Inglewood "Short N' Sweet" tour date. Hernandez showed up dressed in his soul patch and blue suit in character as his viral character Domingo, whom he made famous in "SNL" skits "Bridesmaid Speech" and "Babymoon."

Taylor Swift (R) and Sabrina Carpenter perform onstage during night two of The Eras Tour at Caesars Superdome on October 26, 2024 in New Orleans, Louisiana. (TAS2024/Getty Images for TAS)

During her concerts, Carpenter usually pretends to arrest her fans for being "too hot" in a gimmick to engage her audience. This time, Domingo got his shot with Carpenter as she put him under arrest. So he sang to her and the audience confidently, "Came all this way. Had to explain. Direct from Domingo. Sabrina's a friend. She's like my sis but I would hook up though!"

In the same vein as Domingo's sweet pickup line, Carpenter has a bunch of those on her raunchy, funny new album "Short N' Sweet." Out of all the short people listed here, the 5-foot queen has had an inescapable impact on pop culture and music this year. From her brief and cute 36-minute album, garnering multiple Grammy nominations to her viral short girl-centered fashion and a Netflix Christmas special (in which Brunson also makes an appearance) - Carpenter is an unstoppable force. And I think it has everything to do with her height.

In the opening line of her album "Short N' Sweet," Carpenter sets the tone, singing, "Oh, I leave quite an impression, 5-feet to be exact." Without trying too hard, the 25-year-old is right. Whether it's the discourse about her sexuality or her slow-burn rise to mega fame, she has been at the center of people's attention. That's the thing about being short; you may not see us directly in your line of sight but we're here. And if I'm making bold statements, Carpenter might just be the most important short person since like the late Queen Elizabeth (joking - mostly).

Needless to say, men like Bruno Mars to Marcello Hernández and women like Quinta Brunson, Ariana Grande and Sabrina Carpenter have shown me that being short can be something to laugh about but it can also be a way to be present and stand in my body and make my shortness take up all space in the world - even if my limbs can't reach everything.

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